The other day, I listened to a podcast called, “How to Survive the Hard Times” from the Porch. I was drawn to this podcast because if I’m being honest, life has not been fun recently. Life lately has felt very hard, discouraging, and disappointing. I find myself just trying to survive and “get through” each day, rather than enjoying the days the Lord has blessed me with. The speaker from the podcast was describing how life can be challenging when your dreams and reality go in two opposite directions. My heart sank a little when I heard him say that because it’s pretty much how I’ve felt most days.
Long story short, I’m currently living back at home with my family due to a failed job situation. Back in November, I had just turned twenty four and accepted a full time job in Nashville. I signed a lease for my first apartment, packed all my things and made the twelve hour drive from Texas to begin my new life. I was nervous, but I was finally excited to settle down, start my adult life and experience my early twenties in Nashville! However, that did not happen. Fast forward to that following February, I’m back in my car with a U-Haul moving back home to Texas, unemployed and in search of a new job.
Even as I’m writing this, I am still at home in Texas and applying for jobs. And let me just tell you, it hasn’t been easy. It’s been very hard. At twenty four, I always imagined myself to be at least a year established into my career, settled in a city that feels like home, possibly married or engaged, and loving where I’m at in life. Instead, I’ve found myself back at home with my parents, applying to tons of jobs praying that I can score an interview, single, and overall in a season of waiting. AKA I feel like my dreams of life and current reality of life have gone in two opposite directions.
I wish I had the perfect advice for how to cope with the waiting season, but I don’t. The waiting season is challenging and typically isn’t very fun. Because who likes to wait? Not me! I’ve spent most days crying and dwelling on the question of “why is my life like this?” or “how did I get here God?”
But I quickly learned that staying in that mindset was turning dangerous really quick. Why? Because without even realizing it, I was slowly starting to believe that God wasn’t good and that He didn’t care about me or my circumstances. I would’ve never admitted that to myself, but that’s how I was truly feeling deep down and it was starting to become a “truth” I believed in.
When I start to believe that God isn’t good, I start to believe the lie that I know what’s best for me. Spoiler alert! We don’t know what’s good for us! Imagine if your life played out exactly how you wanted it to be on your OWN timeline. I think about this all the time. How my life would be if things went MY way. I always laugh because throughout my life, God's way has ALWAYS been better. He allows His way to happen instead of our own because He CARES about you and me. He knows what’s best for us and sometimes what we want isn’t always what’s best for us. And maybe right now wherever the Lord has you is what’s best for you. In the waiting season maybe He wants to teach you something or show you more of His character without certain distractions. Whatever it is, you might not see the “why” now, but you can know and trust that the Lord makes everything purposeful and uses it for good. He’s working even when we don’t see it or “feel it”.
A verse that has helped me in moments of waiting is Psalm 16:11 that says -
"You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand."
Psalm 16:11
I think so often we can sometimes approach seasons of waiting from a detective standpoint. Or at least I do! I try to figure out when my time is coming for whatever I’m waiting for or I try to figure out/predict when my prayers will be answered etc. I’ve realized that doing that gives me a sense of “control” and reveals my lack of trust in the Lord. It also leads me to only more discouragement, disappointment, and being emotionally exhausted because I wasn’t created to figure it out. I was created to surrender and trust the Lord. We can rest in the promise that God will make known to us the path not us! That even in the hard moments of waiting He will fill us with joy. Even if joy seems so far gone and impossible to feel.
God sees you and is eager to bless you. You may not have what you want right now, but you can rest in the promise that His plan always prevails. In the best way and the best time.
P.S. Something that’s really helped me is when I talk to myself about my current situation I don’t use the term “waiting season”. I only used it here because that’s how we often define this period. But I found that when I was using that term to describe this time in my life I began to forget that this “waiting season” is actually a part of life. It’s just life. These things happen in life. Ups and downs, waiting, doing- they are all part of life. It’s a beautiful time. Filled with beautiful days. And days I want to enjoy and live to the fullest without being in the constant weariness of waiting. It’s easy to forget that when we are waiting we are also LIVING! So I encourage you- don’t forget to LIVE.
Your friend,
Isla <3
Devo Idea: Are there promises from God that you are struggling to believe in your life? Write them out.Explain to the Lord why you feel this way. Ask Him to change your heart. Find scripture to remind you of who He is and the Truth behind your situation. And then maybe, let a believing friend/mentor into these feelings to speak Truth over you.
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As always we would love to hear from you any thoughts, stories, or dreams! On your team and in YOUR corner! Love you friend!